One Wink Plot
A dead master forger sends half the antiques trade on a treasure hunt for Roman coins, while Lovejoy chases clues across the Isle of Man and is repeatedly distracted by a blonde American. Gimbert shoots at his tenant, Dandy survives an attempted murder and somehow Lovejoy still ends up pocketing a few coins for a rainy day.
Review
"You're like putty, you are Lovejoy, when you see a bit of skirt."
Quite possibly the most accurate character assessment delivered in the first series so far.
Things begin beautifully with a callback to the opening episode and the lane leading to Lovejoy's cottage. This time, however, Gimbert is waiting with a double-barrelled shotgun. Side-by-side barrels too, if my Young Farmers education from the 1980s taught me anything beyond livestock judging and avoiding dubious cider.
Incredibly, Gimbert actually fires at his tenant.
A lively start.
"What do you want, Gimbert?"
"My rent."
The sort of landlord dispute that would nowadays involve mediation, several forms and perhaps a strongly worded email. In Suffolk, apparently, it involves buckshot.
Then comes another wonderful Gimbert revelation.
"I despise you. You deflowered my sister."
The episode continues expanding the Lovejoy dictionary. We learn about a "scan" — rummaging through vast amounts of junk looking for hidden treasure — and being "on the knock", tramping door-to-door asking after antiques. Lovejoy tells us - the viewer this - not sure if he tells Eric.
Being on the knock appears to be the antiques trade equivalent of financial distress. Rather like minesweeping at a wedding buffet for unattended vol-au-vents.
Meanwhile Eric offers Lovejoy even more money to continue his education. Good news all round, as I wasn't quite ready to lose Eric to UB40 and Lovejoy to lead poisoning.
The mystery centres around Roman coins linked to the late Bexton, master forger, rogue and part-time chaos merchant. Turns out this innocent little "scan" of the Bexton estate has unleashed chaos. Even in death, Bexton is still manipulating dealers, collectors and treasure hunters. Rather than leaving behind money, he's left behind clues.
The result is less archaeology and more a nationwide antiques-themed treasure hunt organised by a dead practical joker.
We're told the Isle of Man was never conquered by the Romans. Remarkably this is true. Unfortunately it also means we are eventually heading there.
Unlike Episode 2's London excursion, however, Friends, Romans and Enemies survives the journey perfectly well. The secret turns out not to be location but atmosphere. The episode remains firmly rooted in antiques, scams and eccentrics.
The first half is particularly glorious.
Lovejoy's cottage.
The pub and its permanently unimpressed Tinker.
Felsham Hall.
Gimbert's house.
Lovejoy's daughter's private school.
This is the Lovejoy world at its glorious best.
Even Dandy fares better this week. There are hints about his private life that feel surprisingly progressive for a mid-1980s BBC drama and he even survives an attempted murder after being knocked from his tricycle. Not many supporting characters can boast that particular achievement.
We also get Gimbert in a swimming pool.
Which leads me to have reached a controversial conclusion after much/some/little consideration.
I prefer Gimbert's house to Felsham Hall. Lady Jane's gaff doesn't have a pool.
The American contingent arrives in the form of Edward and Nicole, fellow coin hunters who immediately raise suspicions. Nicole's formidable 1980s blonde perm, meanwhile, reduces Lovejoy from respected antiques dealer to warm modelling clay in roughly three seconds.
Putty, if you will.
The Roman coin hunt itself is good tea time viewing fun. Lovejoy's daughter becomes his Roman tutor, which reminds us that beneath the scams, blagging and occasional dishonesty, Lovejoy is actually a decent father when he remembers he has a daughter.
The clues eventually lead to the Isle of Man, where Bexton's posthumous treasure hunt continues.
The island itself looks magnificent.
The B&B less so.
Even the accommodation fails to lift my spirits, despite apparently being good enough for Bexton.
Fortunately the plot keeps moving. With help from the landlady, Lovejoy gets steadily warmer in his game of historical Hot and Cold. He seems to get on rather better with this landlady than he does with his own landlord, although admittedly Gimbert has tried to shoot him.
Jane and Eric also arrive on the island for reasons best known to themselves and the BBC travel budget. Still, it's nice to have the gang back together.
The climax sees Lovejoy abseiling down to inspect the hidden hoard while the remarkably lazy Edward simply hangs around above threatening to take pot-shots at him.
Which, by my reckoning, makes it twice in one episode that Lovejoy has been shot at — by two entirely different people. Gimbert with the shotgun in the opening minutes, Edward with the rifle in the closing ones. Quite an achievement, even for our hero.
Then comes the twist.
Nicole kills Edward.
Not brother and sister after all.
The final showdown takes place at a dilapidated watermill. Apart from the waterwheel itself, which looks as though someone painted it bright red with Hammerite approximately forty-eight hours before filming started.
Nicole turns on Lovejoy one final time but by now the putty has finally hardened and our hero manages to overpower her.
We finish appropriately back at Felsham Hall.
Jane asks whether Lovejoy kept any of the coins for himself.
To his credit he immediately admits he did.
"For a rainy day."
Moments later Jane somehow ends up apologising to him.
What a divvy.
A cracking episode. Treasure hunt, Roman coins, attempted murder, double-crosses, Gimbert firing a shotgun at his tenant and Lovejoy once again proving that an attractive blonde can bring his wood to life.
The Isle of Man detour works, Bexton's posthumous prank is great fun and the whole thing rattles along like a Volvo estate with questionable brakes.
Bexton may be dead, but he's still the cleverest man in the episode.
And as for Lovejoy?
He's still putty when he sees a bit of skirt or an antique.
So am I when I see a Lovejoy episode this good.